Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Tuesday Positivity
Today I woke up and told myself that I didn't have another choice. I HAD to be happy today. And I had a great day! I think I'll try it again tomorrow....
Monday, June 11, 2012
Thursday, June 7, 2012
The Sad One
I should be posting about our WONDERFUL trip to DC, but that's not what's on my mind today so I'm not yet. :)
So I went to the doctor while I was in DC. My health insurance doesn't cover doctors in Idaho (silly I know) so I went to one in VA just because there were a few things I was worried about. The number one thing I was worried about was my hair loss. For the past few years I keep finding bald spots on my head.(The first time) I'm completely bald there for a few months then it starts to grow back. It's so annoying! Everytime I go to my dr here he prescribed amoxycicilan (sp) but I feel like there's more that needs to be done there. I hate just taking pills cuz he doesn't know what else it could be. So turns out I have an autoimmune disease called Alopecia Areata. Basically my body sees my hair as a virus and gets rid of it. Then it passes and the hair grows back. It's not anything that I can fix or cure and I might lose all my hair in time, but for now it's just an annoyance.
The other thing on my mind should have been a wonderful announcement. 3 weeks ago Loren and I found out we were pregnant again! Yay! We'd been "not trying not to have a baby" for about 5 months and we were SO excited at the prospect of being parents again. We got Aly a "big sister" shirt and had her wear it off the plane when we went to visit my parents and announced to them! I got all my blood work done where I could get it done for free. When we got back to Utah we told Loren's brother and sister-in-law the great news! Then told my aunt later that night too :). But Sunday morning I miscarried. It makes me numb to even think about it. We were even more excited than the last time. because this time we were actually trying to get pregnant. It's heartbreaking. I always heard about people miscarrying multiple times. A friend of mine miscarried 7 times! But I always thought, "oh, that doesn't happen in my family. We all have healthy, good pregnancies. I won't have a problem with this." And who knows. Maybe this is better; maybe something was wrong; or maybe something would have been bad down the road; maybe it would have been a really hard year; guess I'll never know. I just keep thinking, "What if this is it? What if Aly's meant to be an only child?" I guess she'll be one spoiled child. :) I love her so much and I'm so glad to have her in my life.
Maybe my next post will be happier and about our vacation? I'll try to get to it soon.
So I went to the doctor while I was in DC. My health insurance doesn't cover doctors in Idaho (silly I know) so I went to one in VA just because there were a few things I was worried about. The number one thing I was worried about was my hair loss. For the past few years I keep finding bald spots on my head.(The first time) I'm completely bald there for a few months then it starts to grow back. It's so annoying! Everytime I go to my dr here he prescribed amoxycicilan (sp) but I feel like there's more that needs to be done there. I hate just taking pills cuz he doesn't know what else it could be. So turns out I have an autoimmune disease called Alopecia Areata. Basically my body sees my hair as a virus and gets rid of it. Then it passes and the hair grows back. It's not anything that I can fix or cure and I might lose all my hair in time, but for now it's just an annoyance.
The other thing on my mind should have been a wonderful announcement. 3 weeks ago Loren and I found out we were pregnant again! Yay! We'd been "not trying not to have a baby" for about 5 months and we were SO excited at the prospect of being parents again. We got Aly a "big sister" shirt and had her wear it off the plane when we went to visit my parents and announced to them! I got all my blood work done where I could get it done for free. When we got back to Utah we told Loren's brother and sister-in-law the great news! Then told my aunt later that night too :). But Sunday morning I miscarried. It makes me numb to even think about it. We were even more excited than the last time. because this time we were actually trying to get pregnant. It's heartbreaking. I always heard about people miscarrying multiple times. A friend of mine miscarried 7 times! But I always thought, "oh, that doesn't happen in my family. We all have healthy, good pregnancies. I won't have a problem with this." And who knows. Maybe this is better; maybe something was wrong; or maybe something would have been bad down the road; maybe it would have been a really hard year; guess I'll never know. I just keep thinking, "What if this is it? What if Aly's meant to be an only child?" I guess she'll be one spoiled child. :) I love her so much and I'm so glad to have her in my life.
Maybe my next post will be happier and about our vacation? I'll try to get to it soon.
Tuesday, May 22, 2012
The Right Things
Isn't it amazing that even when things are going bad as long as you keep "keeping on" things will work out. Even though I've lost my job, I still will receive paychecks until the middle of July, so that gives me lots of time to find another job. Even though Loren missed registration and nobody bothered to tell him, he was able to email the professors and he got accepted into 3 classes. We have the prospects of a house to live in also. Hopefully we'll hear back from the lady soon. And even my problems with all my "systems" have started to fix themselves...except the whole losing hair thing, I don't get that. We just have to keep attending our church meetings and reading scriptures with Aly and having family prayer every night. And Loren got to attend the temple on Saturday and that brings such strength into our family. I'm going next Wednesday :).
Friday, May 18, 2012
Life was getting too easy
Well Loren and I started to get comfortable with life again so it changed apparently. Everything was going good. We both had stable jobs and the prospect of a second one for him. We are in a play together. I am going through the temple in a week and a half. We've got a great vacation planned. Loren got accepted into Weber's Online Education Degree Program. Aly's healthy and mostly happy. It was too fun.
Today I found out that the facility I work in is being shut down by the state. It's so hard for me to deal with! That place has kinda been my home for a long time. I've always relied on it being there. Those people are so much my family and I feel horrible for them. For my co-workers that completely support their families on that salary and are now losing health insurance, some of them 3 months before they have babies. For the residents that have called that place home for 15 years! And now they have to be uprooted and get used to new workers, new rooms, new friends, this late in their lives. None of it is fair for anyone. Loren thought it might look better in the morning, but it doesn't.
And Loren discovered that although he got accepted into school, none of the classes he needs are offered until at least the Fall. It's just still more waiting.
My body doesn't know what it's supposed to do either. I have to go see a doctor pretty soon, cuz my hair falls out, I can't lose weight, and my body can't remember how a girl is supposed to work ;). I just feel lonely.
But today IS a new day. I'm going into work to eat lunch with my co-workers and say good-bye to some of them. I work the next two days and then Monday I go fill out my paperwork for severance.
We have a great vacation planned and I'm looking forward to getting out of town for a while and just not think about any of it. And when I get back I'm hitting the pavement. If you hear of anything, let me know.....
Today I found out that the facility I work in is being shut down by the state. It's so hard for me to deal with! That place has kinda been my home for a long time. I've always relied on it being there. Those people are so much my family and I feel horrible for them. For my co-workers that completely support their families on that salary and are now losing health insurance, some of them 3 months before they have babies. For the residents that have called that place home for 15 years! And now they have to be uprooted and get used to new workers, new rooms, new friends, this late in their lives. None of it is fair for anyone. Loren thought it might look better in the morning, but it doesn't.
And Loren discovered that although he got accepted into school, none of the classes he needs are offered until at least the Fall. It's just still more waiting.
My body doesn't know what it's supposed to do either. I have to go see a doctor pretty soon, cuz my hair falls out, I can't lose weight, and my body can't remember how a girl is supposed to work ;). I just feel lonely.
But today IS a new day. I'm going into work to eat lunch with my co-workers and say good-bye to some of them. I work the next two days and then Monday I go fill out my paperwork for severance.
We have a great vacation planned and I'm looking forward to getting out of town for a while and just not think about any of it. And when I get back I'm hitting the pavement. If you hear of anything, let me know.....
Thursday, April 19, 2012
A Toddler
Aly and I have been having so much fun! It's so much fun that she's getting older and wants to do things with me :). We've been cooking, blowing bubbles, drawing with chalk, reading books, and today we spent a great morning at the zoo. It's great to have a shopping partner. She "awe"s at all the right times. She's got a great sense of style and loves to be dressed up, even if it doesn't last very long. Blocks are always a good way to spend an afternoon, and even doing laundry can be more fun with help. I love having a little girl. :D
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Exciting Things to Come!
Loren and I have been planning to take a trip out to my parent's house and we finally have bought our tickets and finalized our plans! We're so excited to get out of Idaho for a week in May! I'm already starting to have anxiety about flying with Aly again (in the form of nightmares of never finding my gate) but I think it'll go smoother than last time since Loren will be with me :). I'm so excited to show him all the things I got to see last year and experience some new things with him! And I haven't seen my dad and siblings in over a year! It'll be great for them to see Alysha in person and see all the fun new things she's doing.
Aly can now say many words! She says "please" "food" "more" and "all done" in sign language. She says "ball" "thank you" "hi" "bye" "cookie" "daddy" "mama" "baby" "peekaboo" "wow" "purple" "yum" and she knows almost all her letter sounds (Thanks LeapFrog). It's so fun to see her figure out a new way to communicate the way she's feeling. Loren and I have to be extra careful now cuz she repeats everything we say! Yesterday she decided "flower" was the word of the day. She loves to play patty-cake and peekaboo and she loves to sing the wheels on the bus. We're trying to sing the alphabet song, but she's not really picking that one up. Not as many fun actions probably. She has a butterfly book that she loves to read that has all the colors and she'll gladly point the purple one, blue one, and yellow one out. She RUNS! It's pretty funny actually cuz she uses her left arm to propel herself forward. She likes to color and paint with water (Thanks Granny!) She loves to jump! Loren got a kids trampoline for free over the weekend and we set it up in her room (for now, it's a little big....) and now jumping is even more fun! She loves to swing and go down the slide at the park. She's definitely a climber. Sometimes I find her in very strange places. She has never tried to climb out of her crib, but I keep finding that she's climbed into it! She loves to watch Little Einsteins. Which is totally fine with me. I love that they bring in real art and classical music into their episodes. She loves when they pat their legs. She now can tell us whenever she wants her diaper changed. She also knows that she needs to take my hands and pull them along if I'm not doing what she wants. All day she take my hand and leads me to the kitchen and points. She can also go get anything I need. Every time I tell her to get her shoes on, she goes and gets 2 shoes for me. They usually don't match... but progress! :) She's so much. I love being able to be home with her while Loren works for our family.
There is ONE exciting thing to come that's not. I don't mind writing this cuz I think I have like 3 people reading this....It's pretty heart breaking that it's taking so long, but I'm sure there's a good reason. All in good time I suppose. And 1 thing it's teaching me is patience. And it makes me that much more grateful for Alysha. So for right now I'm just enjoying her!
Aly can now say many words! She says "please" "food" "more" and "all done" in sign language. She says "ball" "thank you" "hi" "bye" "cookie" "daddy" "mama" "baby" "peekaboo" "wow" "purple" "yum" and she knows almost all her letter sounds (Thanks LeapFrog). It's so fun to see her figure out a new way to communicate the way she's feeling. Loren and I have to be extra careful now cuz she repeats everything we say! Yesterday she decided "flower" was the word of the day. She loves to play patty-cake and peekaboo and she loves to sing the wheels on the bus. We're trying to sing the alphabet song, but she's not really picking that one up. Not as many fun actions probably. She has a butterfly book that she loves to read that has all the colors and she'll gladly point the purple one, blue one, and yellow one out. She RUNS! It's pretty funny actually cuz she uses her left arm to propel herself forward. She likes to color and paint with water (Thanks Granny!) She loves to jump! Loren got a kids trampoline for free over the weekend and we set it up in her room (for now, it's a little big....) and now jumping is even more fun! She loves to swing and go down the slide at the park. She's definitely a climber. Sometimes I find her in very strange places. She has never tried to climb out of her crib, but I keep finding that she's climbed into it! She loves to watch Little Einsteins. Which is totally fine with me. I love that they bring in real art and classical music into their episodes. She loves when they pat their legs. She now can tell us whenever she wants her diaper changed. She also knows that she needs to take my hands and pull them along if I'm not doing what she wants. All day she take my hand and leads me to the kitchen and points. She can also go get anything I need. Every time I tell her to get her shoes on, she goes and gets 2 shoes for me. They usually don't match... but progress! :) She's so much. I love being able to be home with her while Loren works for our family.
There is ONE exciting thing to come that's not. I don't mind writing this cuz I think I have like 3 people reading this....It's pretty heart breaking that it's taking so long, but I'm sure there's a good reason. All in good time I suppose. And 1 thing it's teaching me is patience. And it makes me that much more grateful for Alysha. So for right now I'm just enjoying her!
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